Sex Money Mentality
By Emily Wolter
Listener question: How to handle friends choosing sides after a divorce
Mel shares how she got through her divorce and reminds us who and what we put our energy into is everything.
When 6 years of dating finally paid off
Talking about the realities of dating, using the dating apps, and finding the right partner for you - not what society tells you is right. This includes dating someone with a child, moving in together quickly, and more. Being single, using dating apps, dating in a new city, adopting dogs, giving up hope and then getting it back again.
The luxury of ordering Uber Eats for one
I'm sharing with you one of my newest side hustles - walking dogs down the aisle at their human parents' weddings! Mel is on this episode sharing with us the experience she's having as her oldest moves out of the home - how at times it's scary and lonely, and at others it's peaceful as she orders Uber Eats for one. Kids moving out of the house is not an easy transition, let alone for a single mum.
Make $ without touching it
Two realistic & practical strategies to make your $ work for you!
In today's episode I mention:
Have I over-identified with being a mother?
Just the beginning of what will be several conversations with Mel. We're talking the impacts of COVID on teenagers, being a single mother, and navigating your oldest child moving out.
Please don't forget to rate the show - it helps people find us.
Is monogamy dead?
Listener question & a mini dive into the history of monogamy.
Resolving conflict with James the Sexpert
Partners, friends, family. A stepped guide on how to resolve conflict with those you love.
How crypto changed the world of sex work
A Dichotomy Club production.
Redefining real: Love, loneliness & AI companionship with Dr. Lauren Rosewarne
From the most “trainable boyfriend” you’ll ever have to the backlash against single women and emotional outsourcing, we explore whether artificial lovers are a sign of collapse — or evolution.
Dr. Lauren Rosewarne has published some pieces I know you'll be interested in. Check out a list here.
The Rise of the AI lover
Your partner now looks, sounds, and reacts in just the way you prefer. Always available. Always responsive. Not sounding so terrible?
Losing a friend
Losing a friend & gaining more purpose, more intention.
Donating eggs: Part 2
Do your own research, make your own decisions.
Moving cities & rebuilding
If you just made a move solo, sitting in the newness can be very uncomfortable. I’ve done it a couple times & am still no expert. I share my tips for reconnecting today, sending love 💛
Sexologist vs. sex therapist: What's the difference & what will we talk about?
Check out the Society of Australian Sexologist's Member Directory here: https://societyaustraliansexologists.org.au/directory
References
Hertlein, K.M., Gambescia, N., & Weeks, G.R. (Eds.). (2019). Systemic Sex Therapy (3rd ed.). Routledge. https://doi.org/10.4324/9780429297403
US Stock Market: What to Watch
The election is over. What to look out for now that Trump has once again been elected President.
The platform I use to manage investments is IG Trading (ig.com.au).
Attention vs. Intention in Dating
It helps me when you rate the show. I appreciate it in advance!
Donating my eggs: Part 1
1/6 couples (3.5 mil people in Australia) struggle with infertility. I've decided to donate my eggs and am bringing you along for the ride!
Check out Melbourne IVF here.
30 years of lessons learned
Cheers to a new decade of learning. 🥂
Top performing stocks
My portfolio is returning 29%. I share with you the best & worst performers.
@smm.podcast on Tiktok.
Build a smarter investment portfolio with James O-Reilly, Financial Advisor
Find the budgeting tool here.
And James' podcast here.
How we scientifically benefit from intentional breath work, with Clare Martin, Transformation and Breathwork Coach
Clare is back for her second episode and we're talking all things human physiology and breath work.
Book in a session with Clare by contacting her on Instagram @the.abundant.soul.
See more of the podcast on TikTok @smm.podcast.
When and where to buy property, with James O'Reilly, Financial Advisor
Property vs. stocks: Which one makes sense and when?
Find more of James and his company on LinkedIn here.
How alcohol affects our dating & sex lives, with Rahim Thawer, Social Worker & Psychotherapist
You can get more of Rahim at @ladyativan on IG and on LinkedIn here. Find more of SMM Podcast on TikTok & IG @smm.podcast.
From loss to transformation, with Clare Martin, Transformation & Breathwork Coach
Find Clare at @the.abundant.soul on Instagram.
Setting a budget & what the money we spend may say about our self-worth, with James O'Reilly, Financial Advisor
How trauma shows up in relationships, with Carly Dober, Psychologist
Please also rate the show!
How to get the most out of online dating, with Rahim Thawer, Social Worker and Psychotherapist
You can get more of Rahim at @ladyativan on IG and on LinkedIn here. Find more of SMM Podcast on TikTok & IG @smm.podcast.
The tale of a modern day breakup
With James the Sexpert.
Attend the upcoming Unlocking Non-Monogamy workshop: https://linktr.ee/enmaustralia
See more ENM content and message them with your questions at @enm.australia on Instagram
My investment portfolio
Catch more at @smm.podcast on IG and TikTok.
The most hated man by Australian child sex offenders, Andrew Carpenter
The situationship breakup
Vulnerability is Strength, with Jason Banks, Co-CEO of TIACS
Did you know it takes someone struggling with mental-ill health an average of 10 years to ask for help? Please share this episode with someone who may be quietly struggling.
Find more of Jason by searching "Jason Banks" on LinkedIn & TIACS here: https://www.tiacs.org/
Anxious & in love, with James the Sexpert
Good things are worth waiting (and sorting through personal issues) for. A love life update from James.
Catch him on IG at enm.australia, and more on TikTok at bswithem.
What's your (fantasy) type? With James the Sexpert
Today we're talking with James the Sexpert (enm.australia on IG) about the dimensions of sexual fantasy & how our past shapes them.
Catch more at bswithem.com
For more information on the dimensions of sexual fantasy:
Three Dimensions of Depth of Involvement in Human Sexual Response
Donald L. Mosher
The Journal of Sex ResearchVol. 16, No. 1 (Feb., 1980), pp. 1-42 (42 pages)Published By: Taylor & Francis, Ltd.
Am I having enough sex?
Catch more on Tiktok - bswithem & Instagram - @emilywolter_
What it's like dating as a bisexual & poly person who has autism & ADHD, with Ruby Susan Mountford, President of Melbourne Bisexual Network
On today's episode we're covering:
- Ruby's experience "fitting in" throughout their life
- What their learning process has been like as someone with ADHD
- How dating has been (and particularly, dating as a poly person)
& much more.
Find Ruby on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ruby-mountford/
On Instagram: @keptonice
On Twitter: @RubySusan29
Vaginal tightness
On today's episode we're covering:
- How vaginal tightness is affected
- How arousal levels, one's age, and pelvic floor muscle activation affect vaginal tightness
Find Dr. Julie here: https://www.youtube.com/@DrJulie
References:
About menopause: The Royal Women’s Hospital. Retrieved from: https://www.thewomens.org.au/health-information/menopause-information/menopause-an-overview#:~:text=Menopause%20after%20age%2045%20years,menopause%20by%20age%2055%20years..
Vaginal “tightness”: Myths, tips, and what you need to know about the pelvic floor. Retrieved from: https://helloclue.com/articles/cycle-a-z/vaginal-tightness-tips-myths-what-you-need-to-know-about-pelvic-floor
What to know about a loose vagina. Retrieved from: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/325890
How to get better at dirty talk, with Dominatrix Mistress Phoenix
Adult-only content please.
You can find more information on Mistress Phoenix at https://www.mistressphoenixsydney.com/
How to tell a partner you want to open up
James the Sexpert is here to help! Find James at @enm.australia on Instagram, and email him at james@somaticconnect.com.
Can you healthily live with an ex?
Find Raf at @bigbossmusicmastering on IG, me at @emilywolter_ on IG, and Raf's last episode on the podcast here: open.spotify.com/episode/30gZ2yxnVeWQQ2kHnMRkLy?si=3bea3751aa2041a3 (or search "BS with Em Raf").
The struggle of NEW non-monogamous, long distance relationships is real
Find James the Sexpert at @enm.australia on IG, and me at bswithem on TikTok.
Website: bswithem.com
Sexual non-concordance
On today's episode we're covering:
- The meaning of sexual non-concordance (and concordance)
- What this looks like physiologically
- The difference between penis & vulva owners in regards to concordance
The research referenced in today's episode includes:
Arousal Non-concordance and Involuntary Sexual Response. Retrieved from: https://psychpd.com.au/arousal-non-concordance-and-involuntary-sexual-response/#:~:text=The%20technical%20term%20for%20this,body%20is%20experiencing%20sexual%20arousal..
Blood supply to the penis during an erection. Retrieved from: https://myhealth.alberta.ca/Health/Pages/conditions.aspx?hwid=tp10878#:~:text=During%20an%20erection%2C%20the%20arteries,blood%20and%20maintains%20the%20erection..
Kelly D. Suschinsky; Martin L. Lalumière (2012). Is Sexual Concordance Related to Awareness of Physiological States?. , 41(1), 199–208. doi:10.1007/s10508-012-9931-9
Sexual Response Cycle. Retrieved from: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/9119-sexual-response-cycle.
Our favourite data scientist explains why intelligent, successful women are single (with John Ward)
We have John Ward back on the podcast to talk about a little something he calls hypergamy.
On today's episode we're covering:
- My experience dating
- How intelligence affects attraction
- Our inherent need to provide/be provided for
You can catch more on Instagram at @emilywolter_ and on TikTok @bswithem
Listener feedback on age gaps, plus how our personality traits develop over time
On today's episode we're covering:
- Listener experience with age gaps in dating (@emilywolter_ on Instagram to get in on the convo)
- How "The Big Five" personality traits evolve from 16-19 and 26-29
- Why the older population may have more success with larger age gaps
The research referenced includes:
Pusch, Sebastian; Mund, Marcus; Hagemeyer, Birk; Finn, Christine; Wrzus, Cornelia (2018). Personality Development in Emerging and Young Adulthood: A Study of Age Differences. European Journal of Personality, (), –. doi:10.1002/per.2181
Young men & sexual violence: An interview with Harrison James
Trigger warning: today's episode contains information about sexual assault/violence. Please listen only if you are in the right space to do so.
We're covering:
- Harri's story (get your tissues)
- Why speaking up on social media was right for him
- From surviving to thriving: the journey
- What he's most excited for in the future
You can catch more of Harri:
On Instagram: @itsharrijames
On his website: harrisonjames.org
Find more resources and relevant links on his LinkTree here: https://linktr.ee/itsharrijames
Her first time in a non-monogamous relationship: A love life update with James the Sexpert
Spoiler alert: James is dropping L bombs.
How is non-monogamy going for her?
Find us on Instagram: @enm.australia & @emilywolter_
Are you a sex addict or just human? With James the Sexpert
On today's episode we're covering:
- What defines sex addiction
- How porn affects our sexual experiences
- Society's want to pathologise sexual tendencies, particularly for women
You can now contact James at love@enmaustralia.com.au
Find more on TikTok @bswithem
Is age but a number, really? Plus an intro to ENM Australia, with James the Sexpert
On today's episode we're covering:
- An intro to ENM Australia, James' new venture
- Our experience in dating people "much" (such a relative term!) younger or older than us
- What really defines an "open" relationship
Links to what we mention in the podcast:
Sav & Mark on TikTok: @savandmark https://www.tiktok.com/@savandmark?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc
BS with Em on TikTok: @bswithem https://www.tiktok.com/@bswithem
ENM Australia on Instagram: @enm.australia https://www.instagram.com/enm.australia/
Books for those interested in learning about non-traditional relationship structures (in the order James mentions):
The Ethical Slut, by Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy
Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality, by Christopher Ryan
The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity by Esther Perel
Polysecure, by Jessica Fern
More than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory, by Franklin Veaux
How ego drives our sexual fantasies, with Artemisia de Vine, Sexologist & Sexual Fantasy Specialist
On today's episode we're covering:
- The three 'S's' of sexual fantasies
- What our fantasies say about our ego
- How to better understand ours, and our partners', fantasies
You can find more information on Artemisia and her services on her website here: https://www.artemisiadevine.com/
And more from me on Instagram @emilywolter_.
Make condoms sexy again, with Sam Blake, Sexual Health Expert
Episode 3 of our sexual health series with the BS with Em Sexual Health Expert, Sam Blake.
Today we're covering:
- Are condoms actually sometimes too small?
- What to do if you have trouble orgasming with a condom on
- A node to making condoms sexy again
Below are some resources which may help you:
letthemknow.org.au
https://www.thedramadownunder.info/
herpes.org.nz
https://www.health.nsw.gov.au/sexualhealth/Pages/nsw-sexual-health-infoline.aspx
You can find Sam on Instagram (for general information, no DMs please) @sexualhealthnurse_sam